| Author | Message | ||
| Colleentinker |
Sammi, Thank you for posting. I remember that you had posted earlier that you were struggling with leaving, and I have been praying for you, but your post above brought back a flood of memories for me. I totally understand your fears about your job and your social relationships and your children. I agree with every response to your post. Let God show you, one step at a time, when and how to leave. Everyone is different, and we all become convicted through different avenues. Many of us actually do the work of grieving as we are leaving; some of us become convicted, leave, and then do much of the grieving and "textoxifying". There is no one "right way". God knows when you need to move and what moves you need to make first. Let him open (or shut) doors for you. The one responsibility we have is to walk when he says, "Walk!" I'm convinced that there is a period of time in most of our lives as we struggle with the truth when God is using us within the Adventist church. As long as we are open to Him and accepting truth as he teaches it to us, he is using us to touch other lives. If we stop walking through the doors He opens for us, however, our usefulness within the organization dies away. If God opens a door that demands a commitment from us that others will see as hostile to Adventism and we decide not to go through that door because "we can be more useful within than outside the church", then our witness becomes compromised. The usefulness for which we stayed is mitigated. God will lead you relentlessly toward himself, Sammi, and as long as you are asking him to reveal his will to you and are following as he makes it clear, you will end up where he wants you. You can't force your leaving; God wants to heal your spirit and your mind and your emotions, and he does that as he leads us out. If you force leaving, you may rip open an emotional or relational wound that will make your departure more difficult. God is holding your children in his hand. You can trust him to care for them. Ask God to take your anxiety and to help you rest in him. I remember so clearly saying to God a couple of years ago, "If Sabbath rest is really real, then it has to work for me where my life feels most out-of-control." Give him the whole struggle. After all, it is his responsibility to care for your when you acknowledge the truth he reveals! Trust him, and let your heart rest, knowing that each day he will show you his will. Each day he will bring about circumstances that will bring you closer and closer to resolution. Your dilemma makes me think of Nate (Greg) on this forum. A few months ago he was struggling with how and when to leave, how to manage the turmoil it might cause in his congregation, how to manage the finances, etc. And then, two weeks ago, he let us know that it was time. God orchestrated circumstances that let him KNOW it was time to leave. Not all his uncertainties are resolved, but he and his family are walking through God's open doors. You are also walking through God's open doors. Trust him, and rest as you enjoy the journey. It's really quite exciting not to know what will happen next but to KNOW Who is designing your circumstances so you will find yourself embracing Jesus, living truthfully, and finding that your heart has been healed along the way! And Kim, yes, I will pray for you! Let us know how you are. In Jesus, Colleen | ||
| Sammi |
Thank you Colleen for the encouragement. As always, it helps very much, more than you might realize. Kim, how are you doing? You've been in our prayers all week, and Lisa, your husband also. Is he doing ok? Please know I will continue to pray for you both. And Lisa, don't be too discouraged if he doesn't make it this time, it's so incredibly hard (as you know firsthand.) My quitting was a miracle, honestly. I was going through a crisis in my life which I knew would destroy me if I didn't let God in. That's when I gave my life to Christ and was truly born again. I just stopped cold turkey and for some reason, at that time in my life, it wasn't hard at all, that's how I know it was a miracle. I had tried many many times before that, quitting during pregnancy only to resume again, quitting for weeks at a time, then going back. It's just so darn hard!!!! So hang in there! Again, Kim, try and let us know how you are, ok? Love and Prayers, Sammi | ||
| Trippllb |
Sammi, Thanks for asking about my husband. I'm pleased to announce that he is getting ready to start his fifth day smoke free. I'm surprised he's doing this well because I know the success rate, but he's so determined this time. I know how hard this battle is. It is up hill on a slippery slope. He can pick one up at anytime. He has to do this for him and him alone and with whatever motivation works for him. He is coming up on the one year anniversary of burying his mother with lung and liver cancer brought on by smoking. The picture is still fresh in his mind, so I'm hoping that helps in his weak moments. It goes without saying that I'll be disappointed if he doesn't make it this time, but let's not go there right now. Right now, he's going into his fifth day and I'm incredibly proud of the progress he's made. Thanks so much for all your prayers. Keep em' up. He can use them. How are you doing in your search? I understand so much how frustrating this can be. All I want is truth, and I've asked God to show me the truth and I think I'm dilligently searching his word and keeping an ear open for his voice. I found this site where people are struggling with the same issues and it's a comfort to know that I'm not the only one struggling. Why is it that when I start to see things clearly something else jumps in to cloud it all up again? Recently I've been feeling like I'm hititng my stride with understanding this law/covenant thing. My brother is searching the same way I am and we've been sharing. Well, he told me ahead of time that he had a link that was going to really make me think and was I interested. He had moved further out of the Sabbatarian camp than I had, and he's changing camps again. I'm searching, right? So sure, I said send away. Well, now I'm more confused than ever. Either I just took a big step backward, or a big step forward, or God truly does have a sense of humor. But I can understand first hand how hard it is when all you want is truth and everybody has their own version of it. The one thing that I know in this search is that I don't know. However, there are 2 firm conclusions that I have come to in this search. The first is that I can actually be assured of salvation, and the second is that EGW was not what she was packaged to be. Other than that, God has got my request for knowledge and my trust that he'll provide. No matter where you are in your search, know that he sees your diligence, and knows better than you which pieces of information will be helpful and he'll know just the right time for you to receive them. Keep praying and don't give up the faith. I'll be praying for you. Good luck. | ||
| Sammi |
Oh Lisa, I'm sorry it's so confusing! I feel exactly the same way - pretty scary stuff, huh?! Please know I will continue to pray for you, as I'm sure many on this forum will. Good luck to you too! Love and prayers, Sammi | ||
| Loneviking |
Lisa and Sammi--- You're right that the stage of the journey you are at is very scary. What you have to learn is to listen to God, and follow what He says. Jesus said that when He returned to heaven, He would send a Comforter that would lead us into all truth. Learning to rely on this Comforter instead of the 'little red books' is going to take some time. Being involved in a Bible based church that takes the Word seriously is necessary for you faith to grow. Developing friendships with older, mature Christians who can help you to learn how to stand firm so that you aren't blowing around with every 'wind of doctrine' is also part of the formula for making it through this difficult time. Good luck to both of you---I'll be praying for you! Bill | ||
| Colleentinker |
I completely understand, also, how you're feeling, Lisa and Sammi. Ask God to help you know what he wants you to read, and ask for his wisdom and discernment. And remember that knowledge is only part of the equation. The other part is spiritual discernment which is a gift of the indwelling Holy Spirit. God's Spirit witnesses to our spirits about the truth about Jesus. Only in him are we able to distinguish between theory and truth. The information if vital; knowledge is crucial. But God's Spirit revealing truth is essential. I will continue to pray for both of you. By the way, how are you, Shereen and Kim? Colleen | ||
| Sammi |
Thank you Bill for your encouraging note and prayers. As I've said before and will say again, I so appreciate all the support, prayers, and love I receive on this forum. Lisa, a thought I had on my way to work this morning was something my husband often reminds me, that our "God is not a God of fear, but of power, and a sound mind!" I know when I have doubts or am confused I am subsequently very afraid. This absolutely cannot be from God! Anyway, this encourages me when I become worried and confused, hopefully it will help you in some way too. Love and Prayers, Sammi | ||
| Dennisrainwater |
Friends! I have a prayer request for a friend of mine who is studying the truth about Adventism for herself right now -- and her eyes are being opened. She is from Zimbabwe -- and she is wondering if there are any other folks in her area who have made her journey already, and come out of the SDA church to a fuller knowledge of and relationship with Jesus Christ. My request is two-fold. Please pray for her. She is (as all of us were in the beginning) frightened by the responsibility brought by her discoveries. She needs courage and peace. Also, the Lord is already using her in a wonderful way to bring the Good News of the legalism-free Gospel to other people near her -- it is EXCITING!! Please pray that God would continue to give her opportunities to share her joy with others! The second part of my request is that if any of you know of anyone in Zimbabwe or a nearby area who has left Adventism -- or if you have resources which might help her find anyone who has, would you please e-mail me at denrainwater@wwdb.org so I can pass the info along to her?? I don't get to log into FAF as often as I would like, so the e-mail would be a blessing!! Thank you all for your wonderful hearts and for your prayers, Dennis Rainwater<>< | ||
| Lydell |
David and I are leading a servant evangelism blitz for our church this weekend. We have 3 teams planned to do indoor stuff, and like 6 going to do outdoor stuff. The weather is calling for rain....yeah right. I think it no coincidence that there is a major outdoor thing planned at one of the parks we planned to visit. God's timing is at work here! A couple of the outreaches are new to us. But I do welcome your prayers for us as we make arrangements. "Organization" is not our middle name! And please send up a prayer for our teams. The majority of them have never done this before. Many are teens, some are children, some brand new baby Christians, and one is lesbian just now showing a real interest in God. We are praying that they will be so hooked that this will become a lifetime lifestyle for them all. Have a praise report as well. Our youth group had a visiting youth band from another church at their meeting last Sunday night. The report is just so heart warming. My son tells me that many of the younger youth experienced some real break throughs spiritually in their lives. He tells me that one of the songs the youth had written and played had such an annointing on it that literally from the first word that was sung, the presence of the Holy Spirit fell on the place. I'm telling you, the Lord is really working with the youth of our country! | ||
| Sammi |
Kim, how are you doing? Please let us know you're OK. I continue to hold you up in prayer. Lisa, how are things in your household? Dennis - I will pray for your friend in Zimbabwe, and also, Lydell, for your evangelism blitz this weekend. Please let us know how that turns out as well. I appreciate and thank God for all of you, it's so wonderful to know others are praying for me, and that we are all connected in this way. Love and prayers, Sammi | ||
| Lydell |
Perhaps some of you who don't know what I mean by "servant evangelism". The concept is to do simple deeds for folks in the name of Jesus. The idea is that for everyone who actually comes to the Lord, they have first had a number of significant contacts over time before they are finally ready to listen to the full gospel message. So, your job in "witnessing" may just be to be the first Christian the person met who they didn't automatically hate. Or you could be the one who first confronts them with the idea that there is a God, or that He is a God who cares about them personally. The idea is so simple that it really brings home to those who are involved that every moment of our lives we are, or should be, witnesses. Today we had 32 show up. Not bad, basically that's a fourth of those who regularly attend our church. We sent one crew to pass out free bags of fruit at apartments where low income elderly people live. Another crew went to a park, with a clown, to pass out free balloons and bottles of bubbles to the kids. Three crews went to local hospitals to give away snacks and cold drinks to those in waiting rooms. The remaining crews passed out cold drinks on street corners and at another local park. Those who have never done this before are always a bit surprised at the reactions of folks. Some tell us that no one has ever given them something for free before, especially a Christian. Some, especially those in the hospital, have literally burst into tears they were so desperate to feel the touch of someone's kindness and love. One of the baby Christians reported that she was surprised at herself. She'd handed a man a coke telling him it was free, just like God's love, and the guy tried to give her a donation (as frequently happens, and we always refuse to accept) and she immediately popped out with, "nope, and you can't possibly buy God's love either." She said she saw the light go on in the guy's eyes. And that's what we see happen so often. "Ohhhh, it's free and God's love for me is free too, I get it!" One lady reported that several years ago she had befriended a lady while the were both doing clothes in a laundromat. They had talked for awhile about God, when the lady suddenly burst into tears. It seems that that morning she had written a suicide note. She had told God that if He didn't do something by the end of the day, it was all over for her. And then she met Janet. Over the next several months Janet and her friend ministered to the woman, helping her family with groceries (a daughter had just been born and the family was financially strapped), etc. And Janet saw her grow in her walk with the Lord, and literally begin a new life. Then they lost touch with each other. Today Janet stepped onto the elevator with the daughter of that woman. She is now a nurse and is also walking with the Lord. One hospital team was unsure whether to approach one group who seemed distraught. The group was happy they did. The family's 16 year old son was in a serious wreck, in bad shape, and so happy for the prayer that was offered. One of our teens, a really shy sweet kid, was excited about his experience too. While they were in one of the hospital waiting rooms he had offered a drink to a man, who declined the offer, but just stood back watching them quietly. They'd left there and moved on to another floor, had ministered in another room and were moving on when the same man came hurrying up to them. He had tracked them down. It seems he wanted one of the cards we hand out with the name of the church and the map of how to get there. He wanted to know what kind of church gives things away! Where the crew was handing out drinks at the crossroads, a guy driving a beer truck was offered a coke. His response, "well okay, but I guess you guys really don't like me because of me driving this truck right? But hey, I have to make a living." He was surprised at the enthusiastic reply, "hey we love you, and so does God." I understand the teen girl who was there got real enthusiastic. A guy on a motorcycle stopped. He declined the offer of the drink because he "had no where to put it". "Hey no problem!" She replied as she opened his backpack and tucked it inside with a smiling. "God loves you!" I hear she was also telling those that were hesitant, "hey this is really FREE! You've got no reason not to take one. Remember God loves you too!" | ||
| Therese |
Please pray for me. I just received a call from the head elder of the sda church I was attending. He wanted to know why we don't attend any more. So I told him. We debatd for over 1 hour. He is a good person with a good heart, but he has the typical sda mind set. He said he is gong to write out a bible study on the 27 fundamental proving everthing from the bible and send it to me. I said I don't have a lot of time to spend on it, but I would point out what was SDA interpretation and not based on the bible. God will have to lead in this one. Therese | ||
| Nate |
Dear FAF family, Just a brief update on our progress, along with a prayer request. We are getting our house on the market and looking for work via resume' and personal contacts. We are not sure where we are going yet, but we do know that God is with us. He has confirmed and reconfirmed this step so many times and we have no doubt but that His timing was just the way He wanted it. Our former church has been gracious and kind. They have offered to help us with the moving expenses when the time arrives. What's more, they have let me have some of the research programs and the laptop even though they could have had me turn these things in. So God has been good and they have been good.. This is not to say that there are not those who are not angry or disappointed with our decision to leave Adventism. For some this is a departure from the truth and they have a hard time with it. Some have credited us with some sinister motives. Others have not agreed with our decision, but accepted the fact that we are following our conscience. Others are asking questions and studying things out for themselves... Mostly we are happy that people are studying and we were able to leave by blessing the church and encouraging them to study and pray. We hope that there will be an openness in all of the SDA church like some of these have exhibited. Searching the scriptures to see whether these things are so... no matter the conclusions reached, the Lord is glorified by such willingness. Please pray for our former church and their process. May they be brought closer to Jesus and grow through this thing. Pray for us that God will place us right where He has designed for us to go. Finally, Pray that our story (posted here)will have an impact for good. We want to see God glorified and openness to study take place without bitterness or negativity of any kind. Thanks for joining us in prayer for these things. In Christ Jesus our Lord, Greg and Paula Taylor GTPHIL419@aol.com | ||
| Colleentinker |
Greg and Paula, Thank you for updating us. I've been thinking and wondering about you! We will pray for your church, and we are continuing to pray for you and your family. We have gotten many positive reactions to your story from our local FAF people who have read it. I believe many will find it moving and helpful. Thank you for your courage to walk through the doors God opens as he opens them, and thank you for sharing your experience with us. In Jesus, Colleen | ||
| Colleentinker |
I wanted to explain why I haven't been on the website much this past week. My father is in an extended care facility on Hospice care and is dying. He will probably go within the next 24-48 hours. He's been failing for quite a while, and about a week and a half ago he became ill with septicemia, a blood infection which they believe started somewhere in his urinary tract. He can't swallow or speak, and he's increasingly weak and unaware. My praise to God is that he knows the Lord. He is very peaceful, and he's not struggling. We had an amazing day with him Saturday. He was more aware, and he was able to respond to us, to smile and react to things we said, and even to ask to see both of our boys. I thank God that He is giving my dad peace. I would appreciate your prayers for our family. My mom is really quite strung out, although she is grateful that the suffering of the past year is nearly over. Both of my parents left the Adventist church a few years ago and joined the church we attend. It's amazing to see people do such a thing when they're in their 70's, but they do trust Jesus. It's just sad to see my dad wasting away. I already miss him. Thank you for your prayers. Colleen | ||
| In_his_service |
It's so hard to say good bye to a loved one. Just remember, you'll see him in the morning! | ||
| Sherry2 |
Colleen, I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. That's tough. I think losing your parents is one of the hardest things to work through. That is really neat though that they did come out of SDAism and have been with you at church the last few years. Praying for you, Sherry | ||
| Jay |
Colleen, I pray for comfort for your dear father this evening and also for you, your family, and your mom. It is so hard to see your dad suffer and painful to envision life without him. I am so glad that he has peace in Jesus. Thanks be to Jesus for His hope and help. Your brother in Christ, Jay | ||
| Lydell |
Colleen, so sorry to hear about all this. It's so sad to say goodbye. But what a blessing to know you will see him again! A friend in our church died last week. I've been thinking often about what it must be like for her now....no longer suffering any pain and getting the awesome experience of literally being in His presence! What a thrill! My dad died last year. I coped with his death fairly well....after all, he was a solid Christian. The part I had trouble with was watching my mom go thru the changes in her life. But God has been so faithful! It has been so neat to see the things, both large and small, that He has done to carry her thru. I am absolutely certain He is going to do the same for your mom. And that is my prayer for her. I hope this won't seem insensitive, but please let me pass on a tip to you now, even before it is needed. Those first couple of weeks, my mom and I found it so very difficult to keep track of the things we had done and needed to do. All the stuff was just overwhelming to us! We finally got a notebook, determined a location where it was to stay permanently, and wrote EVERYTHING down that we needed to do. Then we made notes besides the items after each phone call. Everything that piece of paper that might remotely be needed was put in one location with the notebook close by. It may help your mom thru some of her own confusion. And try your best to get her to only deal with one thing at a time, and withold any comments or discussion from you or anyone else about any other topic until she has been able to deal with that one thing. Mom was able to tackle one thing at a time. But when you would even ask her a question about something rather simple, she would begin to lose it. Keeping her focused help her to see that she WASN'T loosing her mind, that she WAS perfectly normal, that she WAS a capable individual, and helped her keep sight of the fact that the Lord WAS able to help her through it all. Know that you are all in our prayers! | ||
| Maryann |
Hi Colleen, and Family, This really is sad news! I am so sorry to hear of your Dad and the boys Grandpa's quickly failing health. This has to be very hard to witness. This truly is the effect of one man's sin on mankind. Praise God for the God-Man that has made it possible to forever reverse sin and the effects of it and give eternal life to all that believe. John 3:14-18 I feel the need to contrast your above post and news that I got last night. My SDA friend that was here at Christmas and was at your home for a visit called to tell me that his Mother had died Saturday. In the conversation, he mentioned that in the final days she would rouse out of deep sleeps with a very frightened look on her face and fall back asleep and wake frightened repetedly. How sad to be an SDA for 80 years and still "just hope!" You said: "My praise to God is that he knows the Lord. He is very peaceful, and he's not struggling." Those two sentences are powerful tesimonies to the rest and peace that are our for the taking (and the rest your Dad believed in and accepted.) Unlike my friend, who mis-uses 1 Th. 4:13 to believe he should NOT grieve, you can be sure 1 Th. 4:13 gives you the right to grieve in the normal human way. You said that you, "already miss him," BUT you will be able to grieve with hope, NO! with assurance that you will meet again soon. My favorite memory of your Dad has always been watching the boys and in particular Roy with him. Roy would come in from church and your Mom and Dad would already be there and this great big 6 foot plus tall boy would kinda bend/stoop/hang sideways and hug his Grampa and say hi(Grampa is a bit short.) The look between them was even more amazing. I can't see Lester without seeing that picture:-)) The boys and their Grandparents have truly been gifts to each other. Our prayers are with you, Maryann |
