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| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1737 Registered: 3-2005 |
Dr. Ron Enroth has come up with some red flag questions that apply to spiritually abusive churches. These are some general principles to apply to any church that spiritually abuses their members. Do any of these characteristics resemble what many of us have been through in our journey from legalism to freedom in Christ? Uncovering Churches that Abuse People The following questions come from the book: Recovering from Churches That Abuse, by Ronald Enroth, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Zondervon, 1994. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Does a memberís personality generally become stronger, happier, more confident as a result of contact with the group? In an abusive church, the use of guilt, fear, and intimidation to control members is likely to produce members who have a low self-image, who feel beaten down by legalism, who have been taught that asserting oneself is not spiritual. One of the first disturbing characteristics to be reported by relatives and friends of members of these churches is a noticeable change in personality, usually in a negative direction. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2. Do members of the group seek to strengthen their family commitments? Nearly all unhealthy churches attempt to minimize the commitments of their members to their family, especially parents. Young people may be told that they now have a new ìspiritualî family, complete with leaders who will ìre-parentî them. Church loyalty is seen as paramount, and family commitments are discouraged or viewed as impediments to spiritual advancement. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3. Does the group encourage independent thinking and the development of discernment skills? Control-oriented leaders attempt to dictate what members think, although the process is so spiritualized that members usually do not realize what is going on. A pastor or leader is viewed as Godís mouth piece, and in varying degrees a memberís decision making and ability to think for oneself are swallowed up by the group. Pressure to conform and low tolerence for questioning make it difficult to be truly discerning. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4. Does the group allow for individual differences of belief and behaviour, particularly on issues of secondary importance? A legalistic emphasis on keeping rules and a focus on the need to stay within prescribed boundaries is always present in unhealthy spiritual envionments. Lifestyle rigidity in such groups increase a memberís guilt feelings and contributes to spiritual bondage. This rigidity is often coupled with an emphasis on beliefs that would not receive great attention in mainstream evangelicalism. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5. Does the group encourage high moral standards both among members and between members and non members? In intense, legalistic churches and religious organizations, the official, public proclamations usually place special value on high moral standards. In some instances, there is a double standard between those in leadershp and those in the rank and file membership. Abusive churches tend to have incidents of sexual misconduct more often than most conventonal churches; leaders sometimes exhibit an obsessive interest in matters relating to sex. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 6. Does the groupís leadership invite dialogue, advice and evaluation from outside its immediate circle? Authoritarian pastors are usually threatened by any outside expression of diverse opinions, whether from inside or outside the group. When outside speakers are given access to the pulpit, they are carefully selected to minimize any threat to the leadershipís agenda. Coercive pastors are fiercely independent and do not function well in a structure of accountability. For the sake of public relations, they may boast that they are accountable to a board of some sort, when in actuality the board is composed of ìyes-menî who do not question the leaderís authority. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 7. Does the group allow for development in theological beliefs? Another hallmark of an authoritarian church is its intolerance of any belief system different from its own. They tend to measure and evaluate all forms of Christian spirituality according to their own carefully prescribed system, adopting an ìus-versus-themî mentality. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 8. Are group members encouraged to ask hard questions of any kind? A cardinal rule of abusive systems is ìDonít ask questions, donít make waves.î A healthy pastor welcomes even tough questions. In an unhealthy church disagreement with the pastor is considered to be disloyalty and is tantamount to disobeying God. People who repeatedly question the system are labelled ìrebelliousî, ìunteachableî, or ìdisharmonious to the body of Christî. Persistent questioners may face sanctions of some kind such as being publicly ridiculed, shunned, shamed, humiliated, or disfellowshiped. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 9. Do members appreciate truth wherever it is found even if it is outside their group? Whether they admit it or not, abusive churches tend to view themselves as spiritually superior to other Christian groups. This religious elitism allows little room for outside influences. There can be no compromise with external sources, who, the leadership will say, really donít understand what is going on in the ministry anyway. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10. Is the group honest in dealing with nonmembers, especially as it tries to win them to the group? Sometimes abusive groups illustrate a ìsplit-level religionî. There is one level for public presentation and another for the inner circle of membership. The former is a carefully crafted public relations effort, the latter a reality level experienced only by the ìtrue believersî. Recruitment tactics are usually intense, even if they are not actually deceptive or fraudulent, they can be manipulative or exploitive. Sometimes high pressure religious groups are evasive about there ture identity: ìWe really donít have a name, weíre just Christians.î A healthy Christian group should have no qualms about revealing who it is and what its intentions are. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 11. Does the group foster relationships and connections with the larger society that are more than self-serving? First impressions are not always correct. Sustained contact with an unhealthy church, however, will usually reveal a pattern that is consistent with the characteristics we have identified. Members will be requested to serve, to become involved, to sign up for a variety of activities that, upon closer inspection, appear to maintain the system and serve the needs of the leadership. Abusive churches thrive on tactics that promote dependency. Emphasizing obedience and submission to leaders, these churches often require a level of service that is overwhelming to members, resulting in emotional turmoil and spiritual breakdowns. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Return to Index Page. Last update: 17 May 1997 http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/3658/question.html Copyright (c) Henry G. Sheppard 1997 | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1738 Registered: 3-2005 |
Here is a link to an article from Adventist Today magazine on spiritual abuse that is quite interesting. www.atoday.com/magazine/archive/1996/marapr1996/articles/Resurrection.shtml Stan | ||
| Lynne Registered user Username: Lynne Post Number: 434 Registered: 10-2005 |
Stan, Thank you for this list. Many of us I think can relate to some of this. Many Christians who are not Adventist as well. It is one thing that often turns people away from churches. Many of us have suffered abuse in the Adventist church, and since we were taught this church is the remnant, there really was no hope for us to look outside that church and many of us just ended up unchurched. Now, as many of us have learned here on FAF, that it is about Jesus, and not a particular church or denomination. For many and most of us here on FAF, I think we have a desire to grow spiritually and in Christ. Simply learning through definition of what is abusive and what is not will help us to find a church outside of Adventism that is not abusive, so we can break the cycle of abuse, so to speak. I think the tendency of former Adventists, such as myself, might be to not see some red flags of abuse. Like people caught in a familiar cycle of abuse, we may not always know what is normal. How many times do people who grow up in abusive homes continue that cycle in their lives. The same principle applies in our lives with churches and have everything to do with relationships. A very important statement made in the content of the atoday article reads: Not all powerful leaders are spiritually abusive, but since the Fall humans have sought to "be like God," and the temptation is strong to use power for oneís own benefit. It is the misuse of powerónot power itselfóthat is wrong. "Abuse occurs when the leader conceals his or her own humanity and becomes blind to the humanity of others." (Anderson, God So Loved) Jesus taught that to be a leader, one must be willing to serve (Mark 10:43). If leaders understand their positions to be ones of service, it is unlikely that they will be abusive. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Here is more from your link that I thought was important: Because of its ambiguous nature, there is no simple checklist to which a person can refer to determine whether or not they are in a spiritually abusive situation. I have already mentioned a few indicators, but there are other signs as well. In his book God So Loved, Ray Anderson further states: "When leaders claim to know the will of God as a private revelation, they are close to misusing power and abusing the people." In an article entitled "Are You Under Spiritual Control?" in the July 1992 edition of Charisma, Pastors David Johnson and Jeff VanVonderen identify the following seven dynamics found in spiritually abusive systems: 1. Power-posturing: This occurs when leaders spend time focusing on their own authority and reminding others of it as well. 2. Performance preoccupation: Abusive spiritual systems are preoccupied with the performance of their members. Obedience and submission are two important words often used. 3. Unspoken rules: In abusive spiritual systems, peopleís lives are controlled from "the outside in" by rules, spoken and unspoken. Because they are not explicitly stated, people often do not learn of their existence until they break them. For example, no one is allowed to disagree with the pastor or openly question doctrine. 4. Lack of balance: One kind of imbalance is extreme objectivism, in which authority is based solely on oneís level of education and intellectual capacity. The opposite imbalance is extreme subjectivism, in which truth is evaluated on the basis of feelings and experiences, giving more weight to those than to what Scripture declares. 5. Paranoia: In the spiritually abusive church or family, there is a notion that "outsiders" will misunderstand what the group is all about and respond negatively unless they become one of the group themselves. "Insiders" share an assumption that what they say, know or do is a result of being more enlightened than "outsiders." 6. Misplaced loyalty: Spiritually abusive systems foster and even demand a misplaced sense of loyalty. This is not loyalty to Christ, but rather loyalty to an organization, church or leader. This loyalty is assured by teaching that, "we alone are right," and by using scare tactics such as, "you will be lost if you leave." 7. Secretiveness: When you see people in a religious system being secretive, watch out. People donít hide what is appropriate. They hide what is inappropriate. IF ANY OF THESE SOUND FAMILIAR, you are probably in a spiritually abusive situation. If you believe that God is displeased with you and that no matter how hard you try, you can never be good enough, then you have suffered spiritual abuse. If you have come to the point in your life where you no longer believe God loves you and that you are hopeless, you have been spiritually abused. The good news is that God does love you, there is hope, and your healing is not dependent on your faith or performance. It is okay to be angry, and you can be assured that God does hear your prayers, even those filled with doubt and cursing. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ephesians 4 - 14 that we may no longer be children, tossed back and forth and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in craftiness, after the wiles of error; 15 but speaking truth in love, we may grow up in all things into him, who is the head, Christ; Romans 8:1 - In Christ Jesus there is no condemnation. Matthew 11:15 He who has ears to hear, let him hear. | ||
| Dennis Registered user Username: Dennis Post Number: 745 Registered: 4-2000  |
Stan, Thanks for citing some excellent sources regarding spiritual abuse. Dennis Fischer | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 4139 Registered: 12-2003  |
Great lists. Thanks, Stan. Colleen | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1739 Registered: 3-2005 |
Thanks Lynne for coming up with your additional list from that other link. so many of these characteristics were familiar in Adventism, and I have seen similar stories on this forum that document clearly the spiritually abusive system of Adventism. However, it is well to beware of these characteristics in other churches as well. After leaving Adventism, I was quite leary of denominations of any kind, and I was attracted to a non-denominational church for many years. The pastor was very charismatic, and he is a good Bible teacher. But, now stories are coming out regularly about the pastoral abuses in that system. 7." Does the group allow for development in theological beliefs? Another hallmark of an authoritarian church is its intolerance of any belief system different from its own. They tend to measure and evaluate all forms of Christian spirituality according to their own carefully prescribed system, adopting an ìus-versus-themî mentality." Adventism could not tolerate Desmond Ford and his doctrine of justification by faith alone. When Ford tried to preach the Reformation doctrine he met a lot of resistance. Many thought Ford was fired because of his teaching on justification by faith more than his views on the IJ, but the IJ was a good excuse to get rid of him. I was saddened to read yesterday a story of a pastor who was fired from another former church of mine just because this pastor believed in the full sovereignty of God. This pastor was in the mission field for Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa in Hungary, and when this senior pastor heard that this young mission pastor embraced the doctrine of God's full sovereign grace in salvation (also known as Calvinism), then this pastor was immediately fired, and not even given money for a plane ticket back home. You can read this troubling story at www.phoenixpreacher.com/?p=632#comments In fact, in this particular non-denominational church, you must also believe in the pre-trib rapture to keep your job. What made this story all the more troubling, was the fact that I went to this church after leaving Adventism, and now I am finding out a lot of characteristics that are very similar. I actually think now that a good solid Bible believing denomination is actually more desirable than an unaccountable non-denominational church. There are still good solid healthy churches out there that do not practice the above characteristics of abusive behavior. Stan | ||
| Lynne Registered user Username: Lynne Post Number: 435 Registered: 10-2005 |
Stan, That is a sad story, but I don't think I could personally put that in the category of abuse. I do think that denominations have a right to set standards for leadership according to the doctrine they teach. So if, for example, the Seventh-day Adventist church teaches Sabbath keeping, then I think the Adventist ministers should adhere to that and if they don't believe it, they should go where they think the bible teachings are accurate. Another example of such a thing is when the Southern Baptists stopped allowing ministers to practice tongues (even in private). Wrong as this sounds, their doctrine teaches that tongues is not for today and the ministers should accept that or follow the teachings of another denomination according to what they believe. However, when it comes to people within the church, individual members, that is another story. That is where I think it is wrong to not allow the members to believe differently than the doctrine of the denomination they are in. I think that we should be careful to not label everything abuse. Being that all of us are imperfect and incapable of being completely sinless, many of us might at some point have a tendency to raise our voices or do something that somebody might label sin or abusive. That doesn't make us all bad and all abusive. But of course, much in the above list is helpful. When abuse is continual and also when more than one item in the above is present, it is abuse. When leadership refuses to acknowledge or correct problems in the list above, it is abuse. But my point is, I just think it is a bit overboard to call certain denominations abusive when those denominations teach certain things and expect there leaders to teach what they stand for. Lynne | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1748 Registered: 3-2005 |
The problem is Calvary Chapel does not have an belief statement that would have prohibited a pastor from teaching the doctrines of Sovereign Grace. Chuck Smith makes pronouncements about what doctrine should be acceptable. Notice in that story that Brian Broderson, who is married to one of Chuck Smith's daughters, even tolerated the doctrinal differences for two years while in the mission field with them. It was only when Broderson returned to the U.S., that this matter came up, and the missionary was even denied a plane ticket. If this happened in the SDA church, we would all be outraged by this story. Stan | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 4147 Registered: 12-2003 |
There are truly many outrages that occur in Christianity. Perhaps one of the problems with Calvary Chapel is that it is not actually considered a denomination, and it doesn't have a formal list of standards for organization and leadership. Perhaps if a church "movement" is that large, it should be more standardized officially. I understand the concerns some people have about the "Moses-type" of leadership which is often found in Calvary Chapels. But there also seem to be many Calvary Chapels where there is not the unrest and discontent found at others. I think it is important to remember that while there are concerns about Calvary Chapels, as there also are about just about every other denomination (there are even online support groups for "former evangelicals" of any stripe), the issue of outrageous incidents is different from the issue of a false gospel. I have heard of a great many outrageous circumstances in Southern Baptist churches, for exampleóyet Southern Baptist churches do not teach a false gospel, nor does Calvary Chapelóyet there are Southern Baptist churches where Christ-followers grow and flourish. We really must be discerning and prayerful about finding a congregation where God knows we can grow and deepen in Him. But Christian churches such as Calvary Chapel and Southern Baptist are not teaching a false gospelóas is Adventism. Differences in eschatology do not equate a false gospel, and corrupt pastors and elder boards can occur absolutely anywhere. Bottom lineóI believe we can categorize churches initially in two ways: false gospel or true gospel. God asks us to embrace the true gospel. Once we're clear on Bible-based teaching, then God will help us find a healthy church. As you said earlier, Stan, there's better preaching in many Calvary Chapels than there is in a lot of other churches! Colleen | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1749 Registered: 3-2005 |
Colleen, We were greatly blessed when we attended Calvary Chapel. I am not equating CC with Adventism. However, the similarities are there. It is not that Calvary Chapels are Arminian that bother me, but it is that they are militantly attacking Calvinists. When Chuck Smith goes out of his way to endorse Dave Hunt's book condemning my Reformed faith, and stranding missionary psstors so they have to pay their own way back, just for the "sin" of being a Calvinist is indeed troubling. This says to me that a person has trouble with grace when they act like this. Calvinists of the John MacArthur stripe are much more tolerant of Arminians than the other way around. Stan | ||
| Lynne Registered user Username: Lynne Post Number: 436 Registered: 10-2005 |
Stan did make a good point I think. If I'm understanding correctly, if churches, such as Calvary, do things contrary to the gospel, then they are not much better than the Adventist leaders, because they are false. After all, people are told when they go to the Adventist church that it is about grace alone. Therefore, doesn't that make them a grace based church also? I learned through experience that I was deceived, and in a bigger way than most of the real grace based churches. I think that grace based churches can cause the same disbelief as the Adventist church by turning people away from churches. Perhaps not as in such a big way, but many churches do not practice what the preach. Grace alone. We as Christians are always at war, no group or individual is immune. We have Jesus, but we really must "completely" give ourselves to Him daily. Like when we keep our doors locked in our home, we keep the thiefs out. But if we leave the door unlocked, once a thief gets in, they will not just take one thing, never. They will take as much as they can get while we are not looking or present. So, if I'm not present in the Word of God, I've unlocked a door and let a thief in. Once I accept a lie, Satan will keeps putting dust in my eyes and takes as much as he can. Many of us have learned this as former Adventists, looking back on our experience. Many non-Adventist Christians have not learned what we have learned about following false doctrine. Many Christians follow money, organizations, lifestyles or pastors in the same way that we followed our false doctrines as Adventists. Then it becomes something other than grace, it becomes false, not grace alone. Hopefully many of our brothers and sisters in Christ will turn to Jesus entirely, so they won't be robbed and left spiritually empty. Yet perhaps that is a way many people learn that it is all about Jesus, maybe many people need to be completely robbed and emptied before locking their doors. A lot of people, leaders included, do not really practice the bible entirely in this age. I'm glad to see errors being brought to the surface such as what Stan pointed out here. I also appreciate your comments on those who you believe are following the Word of God in their ministry so many of us here on the forum can learn better what is more appropriate in our Christian walk. | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 4149 Registered: 12-2003 |
Lynne, I agree that many churches besides Adventist churches lead people astrayóor have pastors that lead people astray. I have no problem, either, with pointing out errors that we might be vulnerable to as we leave a deceiving church. The fact that Adventism often says salvation is by grace alone does not make it "grace-based". You pointed out that Adventism deceived youóand its deception is greater than that of many other churches' deceptions. I agreeóthat deception itself covers up the fact that Adventism is not "grace-based". Actually, grace is probably not the true center of a healthy church. Jesus, crucified and resurrected, is the true center. These facts yield grace to all those who believe. If grace, however, is made the defining factor of a true Christian church, instead of specifically making Jesus the definition, the opening is created for "half a gospel". There really are a lot of churches todayóincluding many Adventist churchesóthat teach "grace" without stressing the need for repentance and the reality of God's judgment and wrath. Without God's wrath and repentance, "grace" becomes "permissiveness". I totally agree with you that we are to personally search the Scriptures so we can discern what is truth and what is error. I just think that defining a truly Christian church becomes easier if one does not try to make "grace" the issue. Jesus' blood and his resurrection are the core issues of Christianity. Grace naturally follows if we get Jesus and His sacrifice and resurrection straight! I agree that a lot of people, including leaders, do not really live by the Bible. That is a HUGE problem. And we need to be discerning and prayerful about joining churches, asking God to direct usówhich He will. My point is not that we shouldn't point out problems if they may affect each other. My point is that we can't make all-inclusive statements about families of churches being unbiblical or poorly run if their true beliefs are Christ-centered and Biblical. We must evaluate churches individually unless the denomination's doctrines are counter to Scriptureóin which case, we know to be wary! I think the instances that come most powerfully to my mind are the great range of Baptist congregations I've heard about. Some are rigid, uptight, legalisticóand some are wonderful places where people hear Christ preached and where members are alive in Him. If Jesus is at the core, if the pastors are committed to Himóthe individual church can be healthy and good regardless of whether other "sister" churches might be unhealthy. I've seen this phenomenon in other Christian denominations including Evangelical Free as well. Each congregation must be evaluated on its own meritsóas long as the core doctrines are orthodox. If the core doctrines are not Biblical, that alone is enough reason to stay away! Colleen | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1752 Registered: 3-2005 |
The original point of Ron Enroth's research that was pointed out at the beginning of this thread is that there are many churches whose basic doctrine is orthodox from a historic standpoint, BUT--they employ methods that are abusive. The issue here is not whether a group is technically preaching a false gospel, but whether the methods they use in controlling their groups are Biblical. Enroth did mention specific groups such as some of the churches of Christ that are very abusive, and he mentioned a spinoff of Calvary Chapel called "Set Free", that is a motorcycle group that is really not free at all. Enroth's book did not mention SDA's. But it is clear that some but not all SDA churches fit in this category. Stan | ||
| Riverfonz Registered user Username: Riverfonz Post Number: 1759 Registered: 3-2005 |
Instead of starting a new thread, I will put this piece of info here. Tonight I was watching Trinity Broadcasting Network. T.D. Jakes was hosting the program tonight called 'Praise the Lord". What an embarrassment to the cause of Christ! How can most of the current evangelical leaders such as Rick Warren, Billy Graham etc. give this man a pass? Wow, Jakes was on stage with his wife and son. First of all, Jakes denies the historic doctrine of the Trinity and is a oneness pentecostal. But the antics on stage with his guests were so over the top. I am very careful in using the word "blasphemous" for certain so-called Christian leaders, but this program clearly crossed the line into this type of terminology. Talk about an abusive theology and style. Then, to see the cheering of all the "sheep" after these people. At least I never saw anything this bad in Adventism. But that is not saying much after watching this display that would make the angels weep tonight. Stan | ||
| Lynne Registered user Username: Lynne Post Number: 438 Registered: 10-2005 |
Stan, I never watch those shows on TBN. I turned on TBN out of curiosity recently. There was way too much emphasis on some name brand shoes somebody bought at a high-end department store. What I saw from watching TBN for a little while was plasticity in the characters on stage. I did not see peoples characters molded with potters clay. Some scripture came to mind and I turned the television off. Psalm 73 3 For I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. 4 They have no struggles; their bodies are healthy and strong. 5 They are free from the burdens common to man; they are not plagued by human ills. 6 Therefore pride is their necklace.... 9 Their mouths lay claim to heaven, and their tongues take possession of the earth. 10 Therefore their people turn to them and drink up waters in abundance. 12 This is what the wicked are likeó always carefree, they increase in wealth. Proverbs 29:7 The righteous care about justice for the poor, but the wicked have no such concern. Psalm 128 1 Blessed are all who fear the LORD, who walk in his ways. 2 You will eat the fruit of your labor; blessings and prosperity will be yours. Leviticus 19:15 " 'Do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great, but judge your neighbor fairly. Proverbs 16:3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. | ||
| Agapetos Registered user Username: Agapetos Post Number: 100 Registered: 10-2002  |
I've never seen T.D. Jakes preach and can't vouch for anything in his ministry except this one excellent book, "Naked and Not Ashamed". It ought to be standard reading for most of us, I think. | ||
| Jeremy Registered user Username: Jeremy Post Number: 1343 Registered: 10-2004  |
The reason that people such as Billy Graham, Bill Gaither, etc., accept T.D. Jakes is because he uses the word "Trinity"--just like Adventism does. Since he uses the word Trinity, many Evangelicals think that he doesn't teach modalism. They are deceived by his dishonest use of the term Trinity, just as they are deceived by Adventism's dishonest use of the term Trinity. Jeremy |
