| Author | Message | ||
| Marcell Registered user Username: Marcell Post Number: 79 Registered: 4-2004 |
Many years ago I talked my then-spouse into joining the local SDA church. When my spouse left me for another person, we divorced...and eventually I began to study and be led to leave the SDA church. Well, he still attends a church which some of my family members attend, and now they are questioning who was "the good guy" in our divorce due to my leaving Adventism - which I've just had to accept as part of the price. But I do feel a little badly that he (and now his new spouse and children) are stuck in that cult. I don't know if there is anything at all I can do about it...we don't really have contact and that is for my own protection from the emotional toll it takes. Anyone have this happen, and if so, have any advice? Or, is there anything I can or should do? | ||
| River Registered user Username: River Post Number: 7790 Registered: 9-2006  |
Well, for one thing he was always responsible for being the spiritual leader in the home and just because you might have ragged him to go didn't relieve him of that. For another thing I don't see what you have to do with him and another family he has sired, I mean, last time I checked a divorce is final. And for another thing, he's not stuck in a cult, and if he is, its still comes back on him, he's got a Bible, let him read it. Then again, maybe I'm on PMS. Parked Motorcycle syndrome and just grouchy today? Seems to me if you go messing with that this late in the game, your going to have a truck load of emotional toil.  River | ||
| Marcell Registered user Username: Marcell Post Number: 86 Registered: 4-2004 |
River, yeah, you're totally right. I guess I'm still recovering from first-born overresponsible PK syndrome. Thanks for your plain talk - makes a lot of sense. | ||
| Gcfrankie Registered user Username: Gcfrankie Post Number: 877 Registered: 1-2007 |
Marcell, your responsibility for what your ex does is no longer your responsibility so you need to place him in God's care and let go of the situation. So far as your family is concerned I would tell them you do not want to hear anything about him or his new family and don't let them play the blame game with you. Gail | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 13486 Registered: 12-2003  |
What River said—and Frankie, you are so right: tell your family you don't want to hear anything about him. That's not your life now, and you hold no responsibility for his choice to be Adventist. Once we repent for what we did, even in our naivete, God forgives us, and we have to leave it all at His feet. Colleen | ||
| Asurprise Registered user Username: Asurprise Post Number: 2460 Registered: 7-2007 |
All you can do is pray for them - and believe me, that's a powerful thing to do! I feel bad too, about going door to door with Adventist books, giving them away; back when I was SDA. I don't know how many people might have become SDA because of that. (I think the books that I gave away totalled in the hundreds over those years.  ) | ||
| Truman Registered user Username: Truman Post Number: 91 Registered: 1-2012 |
Asurprise: On the bright side, at least you didn't go door to door SELLING those books. Plenty of Adventist students were (and perhaps still are) conned into "colportering" during the summer. Makes me sick to think about it... That, and "Ingathering." Wow, how brainwashed some of us were. | ||
| Rain Registered user Username: Rain Post Number: 43 Registered: 9-2011  |
Truman, they still are. Every year at SWAU people would come around recruiting students to come to other states to "colporter" during the summer. My roommate ended up in Arizona one summer, selling SDA books to people. Some of them did it during school in Keene and nearby towns. Ingathering seems to have faded out, though, at least in the places I've been. | ||
| River Registered user Username: River Post Number: 7799 Registered: 9-2006 |
Oh Gee!!!! Yall gave away and sold books and had 'Ingathering'? Oh you bad, bad bunch of boys and girls, regular outlaws! Heh heh, sometimes yall just crack me up! | ||
| Truman Registered user Username: Truman Post Number: 93 Registered: 1-2012 |
I hear ya, River... We sound like a bunch of whiners, eh? You're right, it could have been much worse. You have to admit, though, there is something very sick about a religious organization convincing its young people that it's their sacred duty to go door to door, asking for money. | ||
| River Registered user Username: River Post Number: 7800 Registered: 9-2006 |
No,not whiners, I never thought that at all. Its just my view from my past. it just struck me as funny. River | ||
| Marcell Registered user Username: Marcell Post Number: 92 Registered: 4-2004 |
Oh, it's funny all right. But not always ha-ha funny. |
