| Author | Message | ||
| Admin |
(moved this discussion from prayer request area) | ||
| renie Longfellow |
Hi everyone. . .I am glad to read what all of you write about your experiences in leaving the SDA church. I am still an Adventist, but threaten to leave about every month or so. I suppose I should stay because my husband of 55 years is a faithful and content Adventist. He knows about my frustrations but in a non-verbal way lets me know that my removing my membership would be a big disappointment to him. I am interested in hearing how you have been treated by the church in your leaving. What happened when you requested your names be removed from membership? Were you made to feel guilty in leaving? I feel so sorry for you Nancy. To loose your family just because you need to find your own understanding of God is cruel. The church practices it's own form of ethnic cleansing, doesn't it. renie | ||
| friend |
I just want to say something to Nancy. Forgive me for not identifying myself. I am just not ready to. Thank you Nancy for expressing yourself here. I know it took courage. You are not alone and I will pray for you. The devil is at work here to seperate and destroy our faith. The pain and heartache is so intense sometimes that we can't see the "forest through the trees". We seek safety (in the arms of Jesus) assurance (in His promise of deliverance and salvation) and Peace (in His ability to save to the uttermost). And are told from the very people that love us the most in the word that we are surcoming to "seducing spirits" and will be left to our "own devices" and cannot enter the Kingdom of God. "We have been told that our greatest enemy will come from within our own ranks". "It is such a comfort that God will wipe away all tears in Heaven". Some of the frases that have been expressed to me. And I have not left or made any stand on any issue - just postured some questions. Every thing that happens in their family or in the world is a validation of faith in the writings of the "Great Contraversy". It is all coming to life in a markedly painful experience one which they are well prepared for. For me, He is my Rock and my Salvation! I can point to no church, no family or no doctrine. I cannot prove it but I hold fast to that. When I look at myself I don't know how I can be saved but when I look at Jesus I don't know how I can be lost. Simple as that! How quick people are to shut souls out of heaven when it is Christ that shed His blood and payed the price. How quick to condem with out being able to read the heart or save others with our righteousness. Even our own children. The call to worship Him that created heaven and earth IS being sounded. "Be sure your anchor holds and gripps the Solid Rock!" Love and Prayers... | ||
| Lynn W |
"When I look at myself I don't know how I can be saved but when I look at Jesus I don't know how I can be lost." What a great way of putting it. Colleen have you considered moving this question to a new thread for discussion: "I am interested in hearing how you have been treated by the church in your leaving. What happened when you requested your names be removed from membership? Were you made to feel guilty in leaving? " | ||
| Lydell |
Our story is that we had been trying to start a evangelistic outreach, like a branch sabbath school, in a neighboring town. The pastor had given his okay to this. He thought it was a great idea. Until the head elder got hold of him. What it all came down to was that we walked in on a specially called church board meeting that was being held for the purpose of voting to disfellowship us. We saved them the trouble by quitting. No one ever called after that. No letters ever came saying that we were missed. Nothing. And yeah, it hurt at first. Some of the folks we fully expected were thrilled to see us finally "get". But there were others with whom we had been friends for a long time. We really thought we'd hear from them, but we didn't. And if we should happen to meet one of them in town, their attitude towards us was "oh my how very sad that these folks have become apostates." We know now that this is precisely what was said, because we did have a friend from out of state come to visit us once and she informed us that this was the word that had been going around. We, unfortunately, are very slow learners. We joined ourselves to another SDA church that, of course had the same problems because it was, after all, still an SDA church. Same doctrines, same problems. We spent close to two years licking our wounds and rehashing the hurts and battles. Finally it dawned on us one day that we really were never going to make progress that way, that we needed to accept things the way they were and start moving forward. So we began letting the Lord teach us again. What the heck did we believe after all. Was it truly centered in the word of God? And we started studying the BIBLE ONLY. Hey, there's a novel idea for the Christian, huh. Especially we went to the book of Acts to find out just what God had intended for His church to look like. What we found there surely wasn't the SDA church!! We made some massive mistakes. First we didn't leave the SDA's when the Lord wanted us too. We stayed and stayed (at least 4 years beyond the time we should have) until he had to almost literally let us be driven out. I am extremely thankful for His mercy in getting us out no matter how it had to come. Our second massive mistake was that when he told us to meet as a home church, we forgot to ask Him how long. And so we stayed there FAR longer than we ever should have. That's why we are so intense about warning folks not to fall into that trap. God has SO MUCH MORE for you in another body of believers. There are REAL ones out there! Renie, all I can offer to you right now as pertains to your husband is to talk to him about the word of God. When you find something that looks like a contradiction of your Adventist beliefs take it to him.....every single time....and ask him what that verse or passage says to him. Maybe God is wanting to use you to stir your hubby to start doing some questioning as well. And pray!!! Sounds like you really need to think about finding a Christian Bible study in your area too for support and encouragement. If nothing else, at the very least!, take advantage of any and every opportunity to be around other Christians. What about concerts, volunteer work, any Christian coffee shops in your area? Even if you feel the need to stay there with your hubby now, there's no reason why you should allow yourself to shrivel and die spiritually in the process. There ARE other avenues to find fellowship and support! | ||
| colleen Tinker |
We left in "stages". First we stopped attending our local church, then we withdrew our boys from an SDA school, then we began attending our current church, and finally I resigned from my position with an independent Adventist periodical and we sent a letter to our local church asking them to drop our names. At first no one said anything. Even when we withdrew our boys and enrolled them in a local Christian Academy, people assumed it was a tactical move to benefit the boys. (It did, of course, but not in the ways they supposed.) When we finally went public we had a flurry of curiosity from some of our colleagues. Some initially curious people who talked to us stated that they didn't believe in Adventism or in much of anything, for that matter, but they stayed "to make a difference." Then the pastor of the church we had been attending called and asked us to go to lunch with him. I realize how unusual this was. I suspect the reason for it was that we had been so heavily involved in the local church and had become somewhat personally acquainted with him. A also suspect one of the reasons for his invitation was that this is Southern California, and many of the church leaders in this area are quite "liberal" and tolerant of divergent viewpoints. (On the bottom line, though, they generally want to stay loyal, and they don't want anything challenging their rationale too closely. One pastor we know was curious and then, after Richard talked about our finding Jesus and gave this website address, never contacted us again.) The pastor told us that if we were growing spritiually and were not angry or bitter, he wouldn't worry about us. We assured him we weren't and told him the story of our leaving. I am grateful that he did talk to us. As I said, it was very unusual. Aside from that, though, no one talks about it. Sometimes there might be a flurry of curiosiy, but as soon as the person discovers that we are actively committed to following and serving Jesus and are not just enjoying another intellectual foray, they stop talking about it and usually avoid us. It's sort-of like having an elephant in the middle of the room that people have to walk around, but no one ever admits it's there. We would love to talk about what we're experiencing, but our Adventist acquaintences don't want to. Many have quit contacting us. It's sort-of like falling into a black hole. But we have no regrets. Jesus has become our personal friend, and he's saved us and he loves us and he lives in us, and that's something that's too amazing and wonderful to describe. We are grateful to be out--more and more grateful the more time passes. We are grateful that God has led us to a church where we're being fed and supported and where we're growing. We grateful that God has led us to a church that supports Former Adventist Fellowship--right on the back doorstep of Loma Linda! God is good. My prayers continue to be with all of us. Colleen | ||
| Bob Holland |
I sent a letter to the large church here in Southern California in which I had my membership, asking them to remove me from denominational membership. It took that church nearly two years to acknowledge my request. Finally I received a brief, form-like letter from one of the pastors, acknowledging that my request had been granted, we will pray for you, blah, blah, blah. Interestingly, during that two years of silence, no one, neither pastor nor layman, from the church made an effort even once to call, write or visit me, to try to understand why I was quitting the denomination, or to urge me to reconsider, much less to minister to me or pray with me! However, during that time, one woman representing a church visitation committee phoned me to say that my name was on a list of church members she had been assigned to contact "pastorally." When I told her I was no longer a member of the SDA church, she hung up on me! So much for being made to think that I would be missed by the denomination in which I had been a member for thirty years! |
