| Author | Message | ||
| Colleentinker (Colleentinker) |
I got an email from someone who wondered how we explained to our kids the things we learned about the gospel as we were leaving the church. This person wanted some input from others as to how they handled such things. I realize that many of us have kids of different ages, and what we tell them will differ. Our boys were in grades 5 and 9 when we decided to leave, and we had been completely open with them through the preceding years as we read the Bible and began learning the truth about Jesus and also the truth about Ellen. When we finally left, they were completely thrilled to be leaving, too. Part of their delight, I think, was actually in leaving the cliquish, status-conscious Adventist school they were in. They were delighted, though, to be leaving the guilt and the emptiness of Sabbath school as well. Did any of you have older kidsóteens, maybeówho were already established in their social circles within Adventism? What did you tell them, and how did they respond? I'd love to hear your answersóactually, I think many people would love to hear! Colleen | ||
| Sabra (Sabra) |
Kids need to know and understand that we are human and we make mistakes too. I am forever asking my kids to forgive me for losing my temper or anything else that I preach and fail to practice. Best thing to do is just be honest with your kids, explaining that the devil is a deceiver and we were deceived. The glory is that God chose us for a reason to see truth and we gotta go on with God and leave human mindsets behind. | ||
| Dennis (Dennis) |
THE EMPTY NEST It is never easy to admit to your children that you taught them wrong and/or unknowingly deceived them. Regrettably, the somber realization that we failed to properly instruct them in the most important facet of life is most troubling. However, by the time we left Adventism, our three daughters had already left home as adults. Although we educated our children in SDA schools, two of our daughters had already found another church to worship with before we did. Unfortunately, our oldest daughter sent our grandson to an SDA school near Portland, Oregon last year. We are praying that the gospel of Jesus Christ will reach their hearts to alleviate the desire for a cultic education. Our youngest daughter and her husband attend church with us faithfully every Sunday. Our middle daughter also attends a Christian church in her neighborhood faithfully. Our larger problem has been with our SDA relatives outside our immediate family. All in all, the empty nest gave us more time and opportunity to search the Scriptures. We have discovered that every age level has its distinct blessings. As the gospel song says, "I wouldn't take nothin' for my journey now." Indeed, we are thankful that "He knows our name" (a praise chorus we love to sing in our church). In Christ, Dennis J. Fischer | ||
| Loneviking (Loneviking) |
This is a really tough area for families to deal with. I'm a fomer, my wife is still (officially) SDA although she doesn't like a lot of things about it and tends to go to a Seventh Day Baptist church. What's interesting is how our two girls (14 and 12) have reacted to all of this and personality seems to have something to do with it. My older daughter has had a lot of contact with the SDA culture. Church, church school, even living away from home for a year with good friends of ours where the husband is an SDA pastor. She has lots of friends both SDA and non-SDA, but she seems to be the type that needs the 'Do's and Don'ts' and structure that a SDA school provides. She seems happy to be going to an SDA academy, and she reguarly questions what she is taught in Bible class. My younger daughter never did like all of the rigidity and rules and could never see any reason for them. She really didn't have that much contact with the SDA church--the last two years she has been in public school and went to church with me. Today, she is in a non-SDA church school and doing really well. Where things get a little tough is when she shows her mom what she finds in the Bible. Much of it is at variance with SDA belief and that makes her mom rather upset! What is interesting is that this daughter, who could potentially be a rebel---is instead much more interested in Bible study and church than my older daughter. Definitely the personalities of my two kids help decide where they would go to school. What I don't (as yet) know is if that is why their attitudes toward the Bible are different or if it's because of something in the SDA schools. As to how they are reacting to mom and dad going to different churches, my oldest daughter seems to take a 'so what?' attitude and prefers what she knows, which is SDA. My younger daughter wants nothing to do with the SDA church and is very happy where she is at. That's the solution my family has arrived at for now. Definitely the SDa culture can play a big role IF the youngster has a pre-disposition toward a rigid enviroment. Some kids can fit into the cliques that come with SDA education, others can't and don't want to. I hope this helps........ Bill S. | ||
| Thomas1 (Thomas1) |
Bill, perhaps a little clue about the interest in the Bible being different; I attended SDA schools, back when they were "people of the Bible", for 5 of my 8 years of primary school, all four years of High School (academy), and two years at Andrews University. We were required to take a "Bible" class each term of each year. If memory is correct, I really can't remember EVER taking a class which required us to bring a Bible to class. The "Bible" that we learned was in measured and explained doses in other texts. I can remember the first time I read the Bible through I was amazed to find that most of the texts I found were not the same as what I had been taught, when I put them back into context and read them in the entirety of the books from which they were taken Perhaps the daughter in SDA school has no interest in reading the Bible because either she has had no exposure to it, or when she reads it, it sounds foreign to her. Maybe this will help a bit..... In His Grip <>< Thomas | ||
| Loneviking (Loneviking) |
Thomas, I hadn't thought about that but you could be right. One daughter (non-SDA school) was given a Bible for class and the Bible IS the textbook. The other one has a book with texts in it just as you said. Boy I feel dumb! I don't know why I didn't see this before?! That's also a likely explanation as to why I have had to pull the Bible out, show her something and then she says 'Really? I've never seen that before!'. Well, I guess I'll have to see if I can coax her into exploring the REAL Bible a little closer. Thanks Thomas! Bill S. | ||
| Colleentinker (Colleentinker) |
What a good point, Thomas! When I started teaching at the Christian school where I am now (and where my son attends), I was amazed that the administration asks techers in every discipline to incorporate the Bible into their curricula. Some mesh more easily than others, but it's encouraged that we discuss Biblical principles and literally read the word to them when we have discussions. It's particularly wonderful to have such freedom when we discuss literature! Speaking of school, it starts tomorrow. I have 120 feshman English students this year, and I also have some new responsibilites in the English department. I really would appreciate your prayers as I start this year. Praising God for his sovereignty over our lives, Colleen | ||
| Janet (Janet) |
I will be praying for you Colleen. That age group is quite an adventure... :-) Janet | ||
| Loneviking (Loneviking) |
Yikes! 120!! You're definitely in my prayers and I'm glad it's you and not me Colleen!!  }} Bill S. | ||
| Colleentinker (Colleentinker) |
Thanks to all of you for your prayers. This age group IS an adventure! I can't even keep track of how many moms I talk to during the year (usually moms of boys, for some reason!) to whom I say, "Don't worry; it's their age. Give them two years, and they will be SO different!" The first day went well. We'll see how it goes; my classes are really big. Somehow that factor make these guys think they can get away with more! I am thankful for this job, though. It's one of those things I know God ordained and has helped me to do. I DID NOT want to teach freshmen, and now I find myself feeling as if I have an assignment to help them through this year of great changes in their lives. Only God could have put that change in my heart! Praise Him for giving us His work! Colleen |
