| Author | Message | ||
| Raven Registered user Username: Raven Post Number: 115 Registered: 7-2004 |
Dd, I was given the name and number of the local BSF person rather quickly and I left a message at least a couple weeks ago, or longer. I've never heard back, and I thought it was probably because of what Diana said about no introductory meeting in December. I don't like having to leave a second message, but looks like it may come down to that. Right after I left the message, we checked out a church that (keep our fingers crossed) we both really liked. They have "inductive Bible studies" which is what I thought the BSF style is. Maybe that would work out. We haven't been back there yet because first we were out of town for Thanksgiving and then we went elsewhere with friends today. I'm keeping my options open. My first choice had been to get settled in a church and do a Bible study there. I'm also open to checking out BSF, and since we hadn't found a church yet I starting pursuing that. Whichever works out first is what I'll do. | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 1040 Registered: 12-2003 |
Raven, I'm happy to hear you may have found a church. I'm still praying about that for you and Rick. If you do have inductive Bible studies at the church you join, that will be really great. As Insideoutsider said a few posts above, doing Bible studies at your church helps you get acquainted with the women at your church. And, as she also said, Christian women are safe. It really is different from what I experienced in Adventism. Colleen | ||
| Raven Registered user Username: Raven Post Number: 116 Registered: 7-2004 |
Thanks, Colleen. Our biggest reservation at this church is that it is absolutely the largest church we have ever been in, and we are very intimidated by that! However, it was the best church service of any we've been to, and we both really got a wonderful blessing out of it. And the people were friendly even if it was extremely large. We'll have to see if we can fit in, or at least become comfortable enough to consider it "our church." There was a time when a church that size would never have even been on our list. But now we're willing to consider almost anything that meets the other requirements of having grace right and being friendly. | ||
| Dd Registered user Username: Dd Post Number: 240 Registered: 7-2004 |
Sheryl, Several large Christian churches I have been to have "small groups" (groups of 10 or so families that have Bible studies, family social events, support for each others in deaths, divorce, moving, loss of jobs...). They are actually very amazing in their support and love of each other and are much like a small church within the big one. Check and see if this church has small groups. That would be a HUGE plus for your family. | ||
| Dd Registered user Username: Dd Post Number: 241 Registered: 7-2004 |
Carol, Call the leader listed for the Atlanta group and ask her if there is any suggestions she might have. Maybe there is something that is not listed on the website...I hope so anyway!  | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 809 Registered: 3-2004 |
The church I attend is a very large church. They have 4 church services, one on Saturday evening and 3 on Sunday morning. There are no Sunday school Bible classes, but they do have many small groups. I told the minister in charge of older adults that I want a group that studies the Bible, then I found the BSF. I still want to join a small group from my church. I pray about it. God will answer when He is ready. Diana | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 98 Registered: 9-2004 |
I have a question... A dilemma kind of. Well, Christmas is coming up and of course, I am going home with C. His family really are nice people. This is so hard. Anyway, he says they will attend church on Christmas. I was going to attend, but the Lord spoke to me in another dream last night and will not let me compromise to please C's family. I cannot attend. Do you think I should tell C the dream? Should I visit with him but not go to the church that day? (mind you, I don't want to be disrespectful, I am only a guest in their home) Do I stay for Christmas eve and go visit my own grandmother Christmas day?? I just read where Colleen will not ever go with her family, but I have not made clear statements of my beliefs to his family, only to him. And I also am not in the family so I really hold no position in which to voice my opinion. It seems I should just avoid being there on Christmas. Do I be 100% truthful about why I am going to see my grandmother on Christmas? Or leave it alone and just say that those are my plans?? He told me to do whatever I felt comfortable doing, but how can I when it would appear disrespectful to his family, after all I am staying in their house!! Any advice is helpful.. You guys always have such great advice and insight. And I am so happy that you know what I am going through. | ||
| Susan_2 Registered user Username: Susan_2 Post Number: 1192 Registered: 11-2002 |
Are you saying the SDA church has Christmas day sevices? My adice, go visit your grandma. | ||
| Helovesme2 Registered user Username: Helovesme2 Post Number: 58 Registered: 8-2004 |
Susan_2, I think the reason they have services on Christmas day is that Christmas falls on Saturday this year! It is their regular church service - though they probably will have Christmas themes. Tracy, I'll be praying that God help you make the right decision and that you will have peace about it. Visiting your Grandmother might be a good option, but I think the best thing is stick close to God and let Him lead you. Looks like He's already doing that! Praise be to Him who is able to keep us from falling and present us faultless! helovesme2 | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 1046 Registered: 12-2003 |
Tracey, I will also pray that you will have wisdom to know how to deal with this with C. If the two of you are truly serious about each other, it seems you should be honest with him, even if you're not in a position to "tell all" to his family. I'm not saying that I think you should go or should not go with his family. I'm only saying that whatever happens, you should be honest with C. If you believe God is clearly directing you, then you know what you must do to be obedient to Him. C should know now what life with a Christian non-Adventist would be like in these types of situations, and he needs the freedom to be able to decide if he can live with your not attending church with his family if that is your conviction. You have our prayers! Colleen | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 100 Registered: 9-2004 |
Thanks Colleen.. I will be fothcoming. Thanks, HeLovesMe... I am pressing for peace! : ) I will keep you posted. | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 101 Registered: 9-2004 |
I need a hug. Specifically a hug from a former SDA and one from Jesus. Sometimes I think I can't handle any more of this. I hope the Lord carries me through. I think He will. | ||
| Helovesme2 Registered user Username: Helovesme2 Post Number: 62 Registered: 8-2004 |
Oh Tracy! Here's a hug from me! It is really tough isn't it. But God is faithful, and He loves you! Love in Christ, helovesme2 | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 102 Registered: 9-2004 |
Thank you HLM, only y'all that have left (And HRob) and Jesus know what I am going through. I will be at church tonight, worshipping my way into a place of peace! : ) | ||
| Melissa Registered user Username: Melissa Post Number: 617 Registered: 7-2003 |
Tracey, that is why I refused to spend the night at B's family's house the Friday night after thanksgiving. I knew there would be expectations on Saturday that I did not want to try to fulfill in the least. It would be lying to them to pretend I was "okay" with their religion. Afterall, I know they would never attend with me on a Sunday even if they were guests in my home. Since your relationship is still "new" as in not married, don't set up any precidents you don't want to keep the rest of your life.... It sets up expectations and false hopes, in my opinion, and is dishonest if you really are convinced it is wrong. I know the things I say about the SDA religion are offensive to B and would be to his family if they asked me ... because I would not sugar-coat my remarks. But I always tell him that he can never say he does not know where I stand. Many of our problems exist because of his deceitfulness in the beginning. If he had been honest about his religion and his opinions of other churches, we never would have had a first date. But he covered it up and used selective words untl I read it other places and asked him to explain it. I still feel our entire relationship was built on sand. Be true to yourself and what you know of God. Certainly pray about it. I personally also am curious how B will handle Christmas. I'm sure he'll want to see our baby open his stuff, but I'm not waiting for him to get done with church. My other kids will be at their dads until about 10, so he doesn't have to rush over at 8 am, but 2 pm won't cut it either. But the history of communication isn't there, and so we'll figure out Christmas probably Christmas Eve. Don't let these things creep in at the beginning. It's hard to be confrontational in some respects, but speaking your heart is certainly better than a little truth that hides the greater truth inside. Everyone's journey is different. You and I weren't raised SDA, so we don't have the expectation baggage of "the truth" on our necks. Just be very careful about the path you take. If you are in this for the long haul, it will come up again and how you react here will be a guide to how they will expect you to react then. Guide your heart and let God guide your path. I just can't imagine he'd lead you to deception, however much truth it's wrapped in. That's my own opinion and knowledge I wish I had in hindsight. I just couldn't imagine where I'd be now back then.... | ||
| Melissa Registered user Username: Melissa Post Number: 618 Registered: 7-2003 |
Make that "guard" your heart.... | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 103 Registered: 9-2004 |
Yes, Melissa. EVErything you say is right, just like Colleen and HLM.. C will be so disappointed that I can't come. So will I. But Christmas in peace, is better than Christmas in bondage. I love you for telling me the truth. I will not set a precedence NOW that I know the spirit behind the church, so to speak. I went this summer once but I didn't know any better. I am obligated to take a stand. I know it. | ||
| Jeremy Registered user Username: Jeremy Post Number: 162 Registered: 10-2004 |
Melissa, I have to wonder if B "believes" in opening Christmas gifts on "Sabbath" at all. He would probably like to wait until sunset! I know in my family, growing up, opening Christmas gifts on Sabbath was thought of as sin. Jeremy | ||
| Praisegod Registered user Username: Praisegod Post Number: 167 Registered: 3-2004 |
Tracey, First of all, I think you are so blessed to have such direct intervention from the Holy Spirit over this matter by receiving a dream giving you some clear cut direction. What I'm sensing is that God is answering your prayer about knowing how to deal with this relationship. He has allowed things to come out that perhaps would have not come out right now. Some thoughts: 1. I definitely believe you should tell C everything. He needs to understand fully that you are under the direction and leading and guidance of the Holy Spirit in all things in your life. 2. Perhaps this is a way to ask C to pray with you for a solution. As you ask him what he thinks is a good solution, you will learn about him and his family dynamics. Also, how serious is he about praying about it with you for a solution? 3. God didn't give you a dream to just drop you right now. He'll step you through this in an awesome way. 4. Here's my ((((((hug))))))) Be blessed! Praise God... | ||
| Melissa Registered user Username: Melissa Post Number: 620 Registered: 7-2003 |
Jeremy, I never thought of that. |
