| Author | Message | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 933 Registered: 3-2004 |
Our pastor has been having a series of sermons titled "you've got to be kidding". It is all about kids, those who have been kids, those who have kids, those who are grandparents. Tonight he preached on what we should teach our children. He made 3 points. 1. Tell kids about their worth.Eph 4:29 2. Teach kids about responsibility. Gal 6:5 3. Talk to kids about sex. 1 Cor 6:18 It is the third one I am asking about. I did not like the way my parents taught me about sex. My Dad did not say a word and my Mom told me women stayed home and had babies and men went out and worked. I remember thinking, I do not like that and I will not do it that way. I wanted to do all the fun things boys did. Well, when I had my son I taught him young with things that he could understand. When he was about 12 years of age he asked me, as I was driving my stick shift car, "Mom, you have told me about the sperm and the egg, but you have never told me how they get together". I remember almost stripping the gears as I shifted. I did not answer right away, then told him, I am not answering right away because I want to make sure that what I say is right or something like that. I answered his question. What made me start this thread is this: In SDA schools we got one lesson about our bodies and the boys and the girls were separated. Now, does EGW say anything about sex besides saying people should not marry, no masturbation because it can make a person crazy and even married couples should not have sex. As a "prophet" God surely enlightened her on what we should teach our children on such an important subject. I know I am being sarcastic with this last comment, but I am sure my parents attitude was not only influenced by the things they were taught, but by the SDA church also. I am always surprised when I see how the human body works and it just tells me we have an awesome God. Diana | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 1261 Registered: 12-2003 |
I believe Messages to Young People had advice about how to act with the opposite sex. I don't remember much about it--I never could get into the book enough to read it all. I found it boring and tedious. I'm quite sure Ellen had nothing to draw on to give advice except the accepted rules. Her own life seems pretty compromised--I remember Dale Ratzlaff telling us that he discovered she was travelling with James before their marriage as he went different places to preach, taking Ellen, of course, because she could have her confirming visions. Her mother finally said they needed to get married because their travelling together looked bad. I know that in this area, Adventists churches don't do the "True Love Waits" ceremonies for their teens that the Christian churches in thie area often do. Colleen | ||
| Weimarred Registered user Username: Weimarred Post Number: 11 Registered: 1-2005 |
Personally, my parents did some strange things while raising me, a lot of it had to do with SDA. But one thing they did I think was right. While they didnít talk a lot to me about it face-to-face, they did make sure I got the facts before I was in a situation where not knowing the whole picture could be disastrous. It seems VERY silly to me that weíll talk to our kids more about things like seatbelts and smoking than we do about the birds and the bees. I mean, you can go your whole life not wearing a seatbelt, and no harm will come to you. But it only takes a few minutes of fooling around, and BAM, youíve got a disease, an ìunplanned parenthoodî, or even an abortion to deal with. Anyways, around about 12, my parents gave me a set of books, non-SDA, that covered things like the differences in the genders, grooming, dating, the act of union, child-birth, marriage, etc. My parents also told me not discus what I was learning with others, as other parents had different ways of teaching their children what I was learning, but rather to talk with them. This may not work for everyone, but for me it took the mystery out of sex and made me really think about things before I acted on them. It strung everything together, making me realize that there are always responsibilities associated with pleasures. Granted, juxtaposed against the way I spent my teenage years in a bizarre SDA setting, what I learned didnít have much relevance until I ìescapedî to the Army. I sowed a few wild oats, but thankfully, nothing Iíve done has come back to haunt me, and I have no real recriminations over the things Iíve done. I thank my parents for that. Aside from that, I got maybe one or two ìclassesî at Weimar where they more or less said ìdonít do that, donít go in there!î At MBA, and Iím not making this up, I had a Bible class where our multi-week assignment was to interpret what sexual acts were being described in the Song of Solomon. And we werenít supposed to have pre-marital sexÖ (What relevance the Rose of Sharon has with Bible Class, Iím not sure. Maybe we were essaying an SDA Kama Sutra?) On a final tangent, in group settings, I remember weíd often sing ìHe brought me to his banqueting table / His banner over me is loveî. I wondered how many of us realized the Song of Solomon connection (2:4). Sexual imagery in SDA approved songs? Who wouldíve thought? | ||
| Susan_2 Registered user Username: Susan_2 Post Number: 1357 Registered: 11-2002 |
Diana (and others), We are in the same age group, 50's. I only went to SDA schools 3rd, 4th, 5th, 11th and two months of 12th grades. The rest of the time I went to public schools. At my public school the boys and the girls were seperated for sex ed back then. It was really stupid as I recall. It consisted of our teachers telling the girls we'd better not do it or we'd be really sorry for making our parents having to raise the kid we were sure to get from sex and (I'm not making this up.) all the boys learned in their class from the boys gym teacher was how to properly put on a comdon. So much for public school sex ed. However, the good news is that I grew up way, way far from the city in a very isolated rural area. All the kids out there grew up knowing about sex and the result of sexual activities. There were the dairy kids and they had the cattle to observe and most the kids had lots of dogs and cats, goats and pigs. Kids exposed to a lot of animals learn those facts and the outcomes of that behavior just from their daily expsure of their lifes surroundings. I still have some extremely old ( early 1900's) brochures that I think are SDA. One is called, "What every man young needs to know". It mostly tells the young men they'd better not or they'll lose eternal life. It does not say anything about anything except to try to scare the young man out of sexual activity. I'll find the booklet and put a few excerpt on here in a few days. But, really, the public schools and what you describe don't sound too much different. |
