| Author | Message | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 357 Registered: 9-2004 |
Have you read this? But if the ministration of death, written [and] engraven in stones, was glorious, so that the children of Israel could not stedfastly behold the face of Moses for the glory of his countenance; which [glory] was to be done away: Well, another disappointing bible study. Presented this to C. Although he admitted never reading that scripture before, he said the "ministry of death" meant that "If you sinned, you no longer were put to death for transgressing the law". I cannot believe the 10 commandments are the center of his faith that he read that scripture in comparison to the 10 C's being in effect. You know what angers me most? That he doesn't even have the intellect to say, "Lord, let me humble myself because maybe I can learn. I don't want to presume that I know everything Lord, cuz only you know that. Please help me to understand and help me to not be arrogant about knowing your Word." The bible says that God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. I am completely sickened by the devil's spirit of deception on his mind but I am even more sickened by C's arrogance to not humble himself to understanding and THEN making up something to believe a scripture says to match his preconceived notions!! Intellectually, he should notice what he is doing. I'm sickened and angry and fed-up. Okay, so much for my patience. I know love never fails, but I am close to giving up, so maybe I don't actually love him. We didn't yell or anything in our bible study.. Just talked and shared information. I respect your understanding of the Word, Tracey, he says. I just don't interpret it that way. I show him greek words for the english words that he thinks mean one thing.. Nothing. Lord Help me to know what direction to take next. | ||
| Sabra Registered user Username: Sabra Post Number: 326 Registered: 10-2001 |
Honey, I think you self diagnosed the situation. Sorry for not following along very well, refresh my memory, you aren't married to this Pharisee yet are you? You can work with a person that is humble but the bible says pride comes before a fall. Life is short, if you aren't stuck, why be miserable? Sorry if I overstepped my good sense. | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 1310 Registered: 3-2004  |
Tracey, It is that Demonic/SDA/EGW filters he has on and does not know it. Pray about it and ask God if this is what he wants you to do. You know I love you a lot and do not want you to get hurt any more than is necessary. So I am asking you this question. Is it to your best good to spend all this time with and about "C"??? You have presented to him all this Biblical evidence and he still gives it a twist. What more can you do? Our job is to plant the seeds. God's job is to cultivate and harvest. So it is up to you and God to know if you have planted the seeds God wants you to plant. I continue to pray for you and "C". Sometimes it takes a lot of love to leave a person to think things through for themselves and let God work with them. You love him. That is why you have hung in as long as you have. Give God the opportunity to work with him with out you there. When "C" sees that you mean what you say, he may give God the chance to work with him. These are just my thoughts. Again, I continue to pray for you and "C". Take care younger sister, I love you lots. Diana | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 358 Registered: 9-2004 |
LOL at Sabra no nonsense approach. I don't remember ordering a reality check for dinner, but thanks for buying! There's nothing to say to you Sabra except you are right. I am seeking the Lord to see if I should shake the dust from my feet now. But he really seems close. Sis Diana, You make so much sense. I am going to take what you said tonight and really think on it. I get tired then there's times I hate to give up because I wouldn't want someone to give up on me and also b/c he's so sweet and shy and just a warm dear guy. So, I know "Guard my Heart" and make the decision without my heart.. That sounds like "Tracey, jump off the cliff and have faith." Really scary! YOur comment that it takes a lot of love to leave a person to think things over with God is very profound. I love ya back Sis! Thank you for the ear and the advice! Tracey | ||
| Flyinglady Registered user Username: Flyinglady Post Number: 1313 Registered: 3-2004 |
Tracey, You are not giving up on him, you are just turning him over to God. There is a phrase I like to quote and that is "Let go and Let God". That is what you will be doing, letting go and letting God do what ever needs to be done. You will not be there to interfere or be tempted to. You are not jumping off a cliff just for the fun of it. You are running away from danger and the cliff is there. That is when you need to jump and have faith. And yes, it is scary, but God is holding you in His hands. Again, I care a lot about your and "C" and continue to pray for you. Diana | ||
| Goldenbear Registered user Username: Goldenbear Post Number: 86 Registered: 12-2004 |
Tracey, A word from the masculine side... When my wife started pointing out stuff (discrepency between EGW and other texts) I resisted. Now we have been married for almost 30 years but, I kept spewing the SDA parry and thrust. Adventist education is doing exactly what it was intended to do...Create an Adventist mindset. I won't be so bold as to say it is because men don't listen real well, but I do believe ADventist are taught early on that they have the truth and that anyone elses interpretation is wrong because it isn't EGW. Adventist don't like studying the bible or looking at Greek. It is too hard, particularly when you have your own prophet. It may seem like a rock right now, but water is a powerful force, one drop at a time... hang in there. | ||
| Ric_b Registered user Username: Ric_b Post Number: 230 Registered: 7-2004  |
It isn't just a guy thing, Raven didn't (at least seem to) listen to the many issues I pointed out to her over the years. In fact it wasn't until long after I stopped pointing them out that she started to understand. You can't drag anyone to a place that they aren't interested in going. But once she was ready to hear something different the dominos started falling far faster than they had with me. I'd like to think that my comments over the years had an influence, but I don't truly know that I can say that it did. | ||
| Colleentinker Registered user Username: Colleentinker Post Number: 1723 Registered: 12-2003  |
Tracey, I feel for you. I believe Diana is right about letting God deal with him. Ric and Goldenbear have great points about their wives not hearing and there being nothing they could do about it until they were ready to hear. The difference here is that you are not married to him. Your obligation to C is different than it would be if you were married to him. In 1 Corinthians 7 Paul talks about marriage to an unbeliever, and he says not to leave the unbeliever unless the unbeliever wishes to be separated. But in the case of the unmarried, Paul is clear that we should not be unequally yoked. Only you and God know whether or not He is asking you to hang in there and wait to see if C will surrender. The problem, of course, is that hanging in there as an unmarried couple suggests loyalty and promises that you might not want to make if there is not change. It also presents problems with your feeling like "making something happen"--it would make me feel the same way! It's hard to just say nothing and go on "dating" without knowing where he'll come down spiritually, and if he doesn't "come around", you'll have spent years of your life waiting. I truly can't tell you what to do, Tracey. Only you can know God's prompting. But I do believe that Diana has good insight--C needs to deal directly with God without you. He might feel less need to resist, actually, if he didn't feel he had to be accountable to you for his spiritual views. Richard just said that the most powerful thing that could happen to him would be "for him to lose his girlfriend. That would probably be the most powerful thing that ever happened to him." Of course, we're on the outside looking in, and we really can't tell you what to do. Just know that we're praying for you and for C, remember that God is wanting you to surrender even your love for C to Him. He can only redeem the things we actually surrender to Him. We love you, Tracey--you're our sister, and you're part of our body. Whatever you do, we're supporting you in prayer, and we'll keep loving you! Colleen | ||
| Foreverscout Registered user Username: Foreverscout Post Number: 30 Registered: 3-2005 |
Tracey, I've made an unequally yoked marriage and I will tell you one thing, it's INCREDIBLY difficult. I knew before we married, but I felt since he believed in the Lord, it would be just fine, I was very naive. My husband believes but it's not a part of him the way it's a part of me. He doesn't read the Bible, he doesn't go to church, God just isn't a part of his life, let alone number one. Because of this, his moral choices are different than mine. We not only argue about how to discipline the children, but whether he thinks they even need to be disciplined. We argue about what the children see on tv, in the movies, we argue about their music. I have had to fight hard to raise the children the right way and it's made me the witch in this family. I get so sick of the fighting, and so do the kids, they hate it. So I guess now you want to know why we are still together? We really do love each other, a LOT; and we both believe in "til death do us part". So no matter what happens we won't call it quits, we will just work through it, again and again and again. But I often wonder, if I went back in time, knowing what I know now, would I do it again? I honestly don't know. For sure I would have slowed down and listened to God's leading on this one instead of my own heart. I was a single mom with a little baby and there was this really wonderful guy and he was sweet and funny and good-looking and I wanted... We both fell in love so hard and so fast. But, Gosh, there is so much he just doesn't understand about me because he doesn't understand my relationship with my Lord. It's like we are from two different countries, even if we speak a little of each other's languages, we still don't really understand the feelings, the cultures are too different. It's not like I haven't tried to explain; Tracey, we've been together for 22 years now. My husband was raised going to church. His Mother and his Sister have a close walk with the Lord. But his Father never did. The Father makes ALL the difference because he is the spiritual head of the household. My own father had a very personal relationship with Jesus, it showed in every part of his life. It wasn't what he said to us, it was how he lived. He didn't just take us to church. He was a deacon there, he was a youth minister, he constantly gave of himself. When he died, we overflowed the church, and not just with members, everyone came to remember him. That church can hold 400. I won't even try to tell you what to do. I can only share with you what my experience has been. Listen to the Lord. Tracey, the verses you have chosen to share with us are absolutely beautiful. I am wondering if I should share them with my brother. I am going to pray on this, but I would like to hear from everyone here whether or not I should, he hasn't emailed me since I first started here. God Bless All Here Foreverscout | ||
| Raven Registered user Username: Raven Post Number: 228 Registered: 7-2004  |
Ric is right, I didn't listen to him. The reason I didn't listen is because I knew that Adventism was correct and everyone else was wrong. Any discrepancies I saw in the SDA belief system meant to me that I just didn't have a complete understanding. I am so thankful that Ric hung in there and didn't pressure me. There came a point where I thought if only Ric had been raised in the SDA church it would make the same sense to him that it did to me. I couldn't see that in itself, that should have been a red flag. No one should have to be raised in the Christian faith to be able to understand it! Then I came to the point where I really wanted to know the truth, instead of wanting Ric to see the "truth". That's when I started praying, with a very strong desire, that Ric and I could come to the same spiritual understanding. I thought that would mean that we would both completely understand and accept SDAism, and there would be no discrepancies left in that belief system. At the same time, I was finally completely surrendered to finding truth, no matter what truth was. Instead, I found out that when a person sincerely seeks God's truth and prays for that to happen, God will answer that prayer! That's when the veil started to be removed (after 20 years of marriage). I wish there were easy answers, Tracey. At the time Ric and I married, we didn't really care whether or not we were "equally yoked". In hindsight, I'm glad Ric was partially deceived enough to marry me as an SDA! There were enough difficulties with us both technically being SDA, but yet we didn't share the same views on Sabbath, tithe, SDA education, etc. Now Jesus is enough for both of us, and that's exactly the way it ought to be. Our prayer is that you will have the wisdom to know how to handle this situation, and that C will desire Jesus only. | ||
| Melissa Registered user Username: Melissa Post Number: 833 Registered: 7-2003  |
Tracey, B acknowledges those verses, but they don't say the law is abolished, therefore.... You know, I contemplate things a lot and sometimes get hung up on the "if onlys". Since you've not been married yet, I'm going to ditto Sabra.... When I first started on this board, someone told me to "run" if we weren't yet married...of course, that was before they knew about our son. But I still think that was the best advice. Not because SDAs are bad people, but because marriage and relationships are hard under good circumstances. Mixing religions is not a good circumstance. I know how hard it is to give up. But I wish I had had the courage to do it years before I finally did. I'll pay the consequences for some time into the future.... | ||
| Faith2 Registered user Username: Faith2 Post Number: 28 Registered: 3-2005 |
Tracey, You have received excellent advice. I would have to echo Colleentinker. I know that itís hard for you because you do not understand how Adventist think. THEY are the superior ones. I see how much time you spend on this website, seeking truth for someone who doesn't think he needs it. It is time to stop playing Holy Spirit junior. Let go and let God. I would suggest setting aside a day of prayer and fasting for specific direction from God. Be prepared for whatever direction He gives. When you know that you are being spirit led, you will have insight, fortitude and grace to finish the race. Even if the answer is not what your flesh wants to hear, in the midst of your pain, you will find comfort in "THIS TOO WILL PASS" Love Faith2 | ||
| Praisegod Registered user Username: Praisegod Post Number: 293 Registered: 3-2004  |
Tracey, you are getting excellent advice here. How about taking the time between now and the meeting with Raven and Rick for a special time of prayer. With two more people who actually meet and get acquainted with C you may have them able to give you a more unbiased viewpoint. Remember how you have specifically been led by the Holy Spirit in the past? Never forget that. Part of the hardest thing during all this is being willing to let go if that is how the Holy Spirit directs. Praying.... Praise God... | ||
| Lisa_boyldavis Registered user Username: Lisa_boyldavis Post Number: 30 Registered: 3-2005 |
What a great conversation. I just want to add two cents... I was frustrated with Ted's walk with God.... for years. We did go to church together, and he said he believed in God, but his prayers amounted to "Dear God, thank you for the food, Amen" or something similar. I'd get angry and frustrated... but leaving Adventism for him was a springboard of spiritual growth. It still amazes me that God took us on this journey at the same time... anyway, Ted's never going to be expressive and vocal... for one thing he's an engineer, that should say it all  He's just kind of private about his relationship with God. But now he has time in the word - (ok, he reads his Bible while on the tread mill in the morning, and probably day dreams about air planes off and on during his reading time, but it's a start!) and he sits and really listens at church (I wasn't able to go to church with him this week as I was at an alumni weekend- on the way back from the airport he told me all about the sermon and the thoughts he had on it)... I could have never dragged him to this point. But when he started seeing the Holy Spirit in my life, when he saw me getting up in the early hours to make him food for the day so he had time to exercise and read his Bible, when I wasn't yelling all the time, or if I did, I'd tell him I was sorry, he started coming around. God changed him after he changed me. What I'm trying to say is for those married, don't give up on God, and for those unmarried, don't mistrust God's advice about who to marry... and if you don't marry him, still don't give up on him... God CAN CHANGE HIM AND GROW HIM TO CHANGE FROM A SLIMY SLOW MOVING CATERPILLAR TO A FREE FLYING BUTTERFLY. Adventism breeds mistrust, fear and rebellion. The good news of the Bible takes all fear away, breeds love and joy and Spirit controlled obedience. God's Grace changes people others have lost hope in. God can do ANYTHING! And I'm praying for you all. Lisa | ||
| Tracey Registered user Username: Tracey Post Number: 361 Registered: 9-2004 |
WOW ! <Praise God for all the advice@!> And none of you contradict one another. The Body of Christ operating together is truly a gift from God in spite of it not being what I want. It's wonderful to read the directions that you gave and I sooo appreciate it. I will print this all off. Everyone of you should be so proud of God using you to speak words of direction and encouragement to me. I will heed the advice. I will seek the Lord with the words to say and how to say them and of course what boundaries to place on the relationship. I love all of you guys! and if I had the time, I would respond to each of you, but trust me when I say you all have spoken life into my spirit that I praise God for! You all also confirmed that I am giving a lot of dating time, pushing this on him, in God's way, and not trusting the Lord enough, as well as trying to do it myself. I know this is a spiritual battle, and yet I try to convince him in the Word, in the natural. One good thing, I just got a new job outside of his dept. and I think that will help the relationship -- some physical separation can't hurt. He already says he misses me, so maybe on a grander scale, Richard will be right! haha! Doesn't really matter though. The main thing is doing the Lord's will and opening up to hear from Him. I know for a fact that he has spoken in this discussion. The word says "by two or three witnesses my word will be established". He has spoken in my spirit much if not all of the answers and counsel that you have provided to me. It is confirmation. And my spirit bears witness to the things laid in your spirit and heart to tell me. The support here at this site from all of you is indescribable. It is God's love. Thank you and I love you guys! oxox Tracey |
